A 2020 throwback to nearly a year ago….who do you love?
“Love is such a powerful energy and I’m so grateful that I have an amazing family immediate and extended family that fills me with love and contentment. This weekend in particular, our entire family is so excited to share that love with the newest member of our large family- as we are getting to to meet my niece for the first time.
Our sweet niece was born on the 27th March, just as restrictions about travel changed our March, April and May. We have been sending our love in messages and conversations, but nothing says love quite the same way as touch. And being able to touch and hold to express love in the way we would like to, has not been possible.
But this weekend, we will get to share that love and touch, with this new baby and to my sister and brother in law who have become parents these past few months. I’m also so looking forward to seeing the love from my own children being shared with their new baby cousin (they are just so excited to meet her!)-it will be a picture of love overflowing!
So I hope that you are able to have love in your life, make sure those that you love, hear it from you today and may your heart be full.”
And this weekend in 2021, we have the same Miss Molly visiting us from Melbourne-so grateful that we have her and my sisters (and brothers) be such a huge part of our lives!
Alignment is listening really carefully to that instinct or inner voice and hearing it say YES.
Alternatively, when things are not aligned you might notice a niggle of discomfort, more stress, noticing yourself justify that things are ok the way they are. And often this will get more obvious as time goes on, and you might find yourself wondering why rubbish things keep happening. This is a clue that you are not in alignment for you. So try and find some time to reduce the noise in your mind and around youand make things quiet. We need to make things quiet so we can really tun into ourselves. Notice what other people might want for us, but recognise that this is their intentions, not necessarily ours. As yourself what you want and why. When I need to do this, yoga and mindfulness helps, as does journaling. It helps me get back to my ’why’ and do a check if my actions are synced with this.
Some crossroads are obvious, others less so. I know there have been some in my career, including the decision to ditch my thoughts of wanting to be an illustrator or to do graphic design when I was in high-school and head toward psychology, or decide that regardless of the competition I was going to do whatever it took to get my place in a Masters of Clinical Psychology. Or to go out under my own business brand in 2018 and then deciding to launch online programs in 2019……But today I was at another crossroads and this was the decision that I was going to become a published author. Some of you may be aware (or not) that this year I decided I was going to write a book this year. Now that to me is no small goal and although I have put plans in motion for this last year, have broken down this seemingly huge task into smaller tasks, it feels much like it did when I was going to write a thesis for my Honours year (and again for my Masters degree). Big, overwhelming and seemingly far-fetched that it could actually be accomplished. However today I spoke about having drafted out the plans for each of the chapters and feeling the need to begin writing the chapters, despite feeling unsure about how it will every be published. I was reminded by a wise person that it would be published, that was certain.But with encouragement, I’ve taken the steps and written nearly three chapters. So I feel like I’ve just made the decision at that cross road-to let my dream be just that-a dream of having written a book -one day, or actually continue to take action and make it happen. I feel like I know now that my book will be published, it will just be a matter of by whom-a publisher, or by me-self-published. So I don’t know whether I will look back and think this was a significant decision for my life ahead or not, but today it felt like a really good one. So have courage to make decisions that feel right and true for you and see where they take you.Kate x
#flashbackFlashback to 2013…..to when I had a daughter who had just started school, and a three year old and 16 month old at home with me. In this clip we are teaching my nearly 4 year old how to use her new camera and it perfectly captures the chaos, silliness and fun of our family at this time. Not to mention from here on we had more photos of double chins, up noses, toes, floors, tv shows and our pets than I can possibly count. These kid videos perfectly capture this time and way better than the photos and videos that I took. So I’m really glad they did learn to use the technology, as it is great to reminisce through these.Where did you find yourself in 2013?
I’m still dreaming of going on holiday and just when I think it’s time to start booking….the dreaded COVID-19 restrictions puts doubts in my mind again. But in a true optimistic style, I actually began scouring for beach front apartments tonight. So I’m determined to have some beach time before too long!
What keeps me going when things are difficult, when I’m tired and overwhelmed? Why do I work as hard and as consistently as I do? Yes I have to remind myself at times….
For me, my work at Side by Side Psychology or in my online group work is fuelled by a passion to make a difference for the better. It’s the belief that every child, teen and adult deserves to feel good about who they are and to have the option to have a great life. With this passion and understanding that has grown and evolved over the years, I really believe that it is up to me and people like me, to use the knowledge we have to try and make positive impact on the world. Whenever I feel that things are getting overwhelming or I’m wishing for a simpler life, where I cared less about it all, so I could be less driven, I think about my own children and what my wish is for them and what I’ve been prepared to do to have this. I’ve been fortunate to have been able to give my children skills, safety, attachment, optimism and guidance. And I know as they grow they always have me and our family to lean on for help, love and support. However I know that not every family is as fortunate as this, or is as easily able to access these kinds of resources. But I also know that for most families there is a deep desire as parents, to be the best for our children, to help them as much as possible and to provide them a wonderful life, and/or skills to make their life great. It is this knowledge that drives me to keep innovating, keep caring and keep thinking of ways that I can help as many children, teens and families as I can.
For those that are new to following me, I thought it would be a good idea to let you learn a bit about me.
So my profession is a clinical psychologist, and I have a real passion working with autistic individuals (children, teens and adults). The longer I’ve been working in this space and listening to my clients, I’ve become more attuned to the influence of positive psychology and the neurodiversity model. I’ve been in private practice since about 2006 in some capacity, and have been running my own private practice since 2012 and opened Side by Side Psychology in 2018, with expanding to include my first team member, Zoe last year. I’ve begun branching out into the online group coaching space in 2020 in an effort to support more families and parents this past year. Private practice is wonderful for me because it allows me to be flexible enough to be very present for my three daughters (8,11 and 13) in the way I want to. I’ve been married for nearly 16 years and family is super important to me. I’m from a big family myself (one of 6 kids) and am lucky that nearly all my siblings live nearby. I love animals nearly as much as I love children and am fortunate our first fur babies have been with us for 16 and 12 years respectively.
When not working, I’m a book lover and I also I really enjoy attending Body Balance(TM) classes at my local gym, which is a yoga, Thai chi and Pilates fusion. During last year’s lockdowns fell in love with bike riding with my girls (when everything else was closed). I’ve also just learnt how to stand-up paddle board and I love learning how to do new activities with my family. Moving my body and feeling energised has been an important part of maintaining good mental health and looking after myself and my family and it’s something that I often remind myself about the importance of- as it has such ongoing benefits.
So over to you, what’s something you’d like to share about yourself that has helped you to keep caring for yourself or your family?
I AM ONLY GOING TO SAY YES TO THINGS THAT ARE ALIGNED FOR ME AND THE GOALS I’VE SET.
Making these kinds of declarations is a helpful way for me to stay on track and make sure my actions match my intentions. It helps me to be definite in what I want and know what I don’t want and helps me to meet my goals, even though for me a declaration it is not a goal per say.
Do you have declarations that have helped shape your life the way you want it to be? And if you do make them, who do you make them to-yourself or do you tell others around you? Sometimes choosing particular people to tell about these intentions can really help you stick to them.
A declaration can also be be short term thing, too. For example it could be about how you intend your day to go, or how you decide your attitude will be.
So I encourage you to make a declaration today about how things will go and see how that feels for you and what happens.