Celebrating that the first 3 months of the year are nearly done! How fast has it gone?! I’m celebrating that I’m very close to having the draft of my book completed, that I’ve been able to give a review to another author on their amazing new book, that I have a weekend of catching up with family and relatives from away this Easter weekend, that we’ve celebrated a dance concert and a basketball grandfinal already this year, with lots of great sporting activities planned for the year. I’m celebrating that 2021 has not been the rollercoaster that 2020 was at this same time and that there is a great deal to be grateful for, including the ability to begin party planning for the run of birthdays that is about to start in our family.
What’s your mini or not so mini-celebration as you reflect on the past three months of 2021?
I love candles and the different smells, but don’t put them on as much as I would like, my husband is very sensitive to smells and no matter how nice I think they are, he never seems to agree! So if candles had slogans on them mine might be “Quick light me, hubby is out of the house!” If your candle could talk to you, or remind you of something what would it say? I think scent is such a powerful shifter of emotions, so it could be really helpful to have a reminder of that.Could it be “You light me up!”, “Breath me in” “Become lighter” or something else that your candle reminds you of?Here is my current favourite candle, which has a lovely heavy sent of Oakwood, Leather, Moss and Patchouli.
Do you have to regularly take brave action because anxiety is something that visits you regularly? Brave: one definition is “having or showing mental or moral strength to face danger, fear, or difficulty”Feeling brave is such an interesting mix of emotions-it’s recognising fear and choosing to behave against the instincts of safety and security.
In some circumstances people can look at people acting in a brave manner and mistakenly assume they are not afraid. And we know this is not necessarily the case, in fact I’ve always thought that understanding bravery meant recognising that it occurs in the face of feelings of fear, insecurity, doubt, anxiety and worry. It’s the actions and hopefulness that propels brave action, and sometimes acting brave helps those hopeful, courageous and strong feelings grow.
Sometimes courage doesn’t have this effect until the behaviour is over, but usually we feel more positive after brave actions we may even feel a sense of accomplishment and pride. Acting against our fear instincts is usually done because there is belief that this will be beneficial for us in some way. It should be done because we trust that our anxiety is not ‘trustworthy’ in this instance and that we logically understand pushing through the fear will be worth it.
So being ‘brave’ is not something that should be encouraged without careful thought and ignoring fear and anxiety should also be listened to carefully before choosing to push through it. Like the risks of being ‘positive’ in a blanket toxic manner, we need to be careful not to use encouragement to be ‘brave’ whether to ourselves or our children, as a dismissing statement about not being allowed space to feel anxious or (because all emotions are absolutely valid) but listening and taking note of our emotions and then deciding what actions are going to be most aligned with our goals and values. Sometime that will mean taking brave action and sometimes that will mean listening to our anxiety and that action will be ‘brave’ in its own unique way.
What great shows have you been watching lately? I recently watched The Old Guard, even though I thought it was not really in my genre as I thought a little too much like a blah action flick. But I really enjoyed it and was also impressed by it’s soundtrack and have now found a new music artist that I really love-Active Child.Plus I’ve now found out that it’s likely to be a trilogy series, so more good movies to come and possibly a book series to hunt down to read!
What’s the meaning of my name? I didn’t know until today, but generally, I have viewed my name as a little unexciting, just because the name Kate is so common. (Hence I’ve given my daughters what I think are interesting and different names).
In researching this I found on a name website where it looks at the meaning and history of names that others associate the name Kate with: ‘Classic, natural, wholesome, strong, refined, simple and nerdy’.
I actually like many of these words and would be happy to have them describe me, but whether they do is another matter. The main meaning that come up frequently is that Kate means ‘pure.’
Well I think my intentions and messages from the heart are pure, so perhaps there’s something to be said for it…!
I don’t love living so far from cities and other people (when it involves 8 hour car rides with unsettled kids), but I do like that it is away from the hustle and bustle of city living.
I don’t like living in a dessert, however I do like the warmth of summer and autumn and the clear skies we have during the day and at night.
I don’t like living away from the beach (because I love the expanse, the view and the scents of the ocean), but I do love the river, the bush and the amazing family and friends that live where I do.
So you don’t have to love EVERYTHING about where you live, to love it. And I think that is true for many things in life. There will likely always be things we like and dislike about things, but our overall feelings can still be positive.
A 2020 throwback to nearly a year ago….who do you love?
“Love is such a powerful energy and I’m so grateful that I have an amazing family immediate and extended family that fills me with love and contentment. This weekend in particular, our entire family is so excited to share that love with the newest member of our large family- as we are getting to to meet my niece for the first time.
Our sweet niece was born on the 27th March, just as restrictions about travel changed our March, April and May. We have been sending our love in messages and conversations, but nothing says love quite the same way as touch. And being able to touch and hold to express love in the way we would like to, has not been possible.
But this weekend, we will get to share that love and touch, with this new baby and to my sister and brother in law who have become parents these past few months. I’m also so looking forward to seeing the love from my own children being shared with their new baby cousin (they are just so excited to meet her!)-it will be a picture of love overflowing!
So I hope that you are able to have love in your life, make sure those that you love, hear it from you today and may your heart be full.”
And this weekend in 2021, we have the same Miss Molly visiting us from Melbourne-so grateful that we have her and my sisters (and brothers) be such a huge part of our lives!
Alignment is listening really carefully to that instinct or inner voice and hearing it say YES.
Alternatively, when things are not aligned you might notice a niggle of discomfort, more stress, noticing yourself justify that things are ok the way they are. And often this will get more obvious as time goes on, and you might find yourself wondering why rubbish things keep happening. This is a clue that you are not in alignment for you. So try and find some time to reduce the noise in your mind and around youand make things quiet. We need to make things quiet so we can really tun into ourselves. Notice what other people might want for us, but recognise that this is their intentions, not necessarily ours. As yourself what you want and why. When I need to do this, yoga and mindfulness helps, as does journaling. It helps me get back to my ’why’ and do a check if my actions are synced with this.
Some crossroads are obvious, others less so. I know there have been some in my career, including the decision to ditch my thoughts of wanting to be an illustrator or to do graphic design when I was in high-school and head toward psychology, or decide that regardless of the competition I was going to do whatever it took to get my place in a Masters of Clinical Psychology. Or to go out under my own business brand in 2018 and then deciding to launch online programs in 2019……But today I was at another crossroads and this was the decision that I was going to become a published author. Some of you may be aware (or not) that this year I decided I was going to write a book this year. Now that to me is no small goal and although I have put plans in motion for this last year, have broken down this seemingly huge task into smaller tasks, it feels much like it did when I was going to write a thesis for my Honours year (and again for my Masters degree). Big, overwhelming and seemingly far-fetched that it could actually be accomplished. However today I spoke about having drafted out the plans for each of the chapters and feeling the need to begin writing the chapters, despite feeling unsure about how it will every be published. I was reminded by a wise person that it would be published, that was certain.But with encouragement, I’ve taken the steps and written nearly three chapters. So I feel like I’ve just made the decision at that cross road-to let my dream be just that-a dream of having written a book -one day, or actually continue to take action and make it happen. I feel like I know now that my book will be published, it will just be a matter of by whom-a publisher, or by me-self-published. So I don’t know whether I will look back and think this was a significant decision for my life ahead or not, but today it felt like a really good one. So have courage to make decisions that feel right and true for you and see where they take you.Kate x